I am white trash...

... as far as the city of Torrance is concerned.

I come home on Wednesday and Dena hands me a certified letter from the city of Torrance. Apparently our parkway (the 4ft wide grass strip between the sidewalk and street) was in violation of city ordnance. "No person shall plant or grow any vegetation taller than 18in... nor shall any home owner allow vegetation to become over grown so as to provide shelter to vermin..." Like I need one more thing on my plate.

The Parkway Project, as it has been monikered, originally was a neat and tidy arrangement of lavender, society garlic, lilly of the Nile, buffalo grass and sweet broom. That was B.M.B.A. (Before MBA)

The Parkway Project has since become my Waterloo.

There was nothing sweet about the sweet broom. It was so prolific it shot up to 6 feet tall in 3 months. Caterpillars were the only creatures that found it sweet - they infested them, one died last summer (the plant, not a caterpillar). The carcass stood as a large skeletal reminder of how little time I had to garden.

The lavender became about 5 ft in diameter and 2-1/2 ft high. At one point one of them threatened to colonize the front lawn after fording the sidewalk.

The lillys all died - I guess full sun on the label doesn't apply to the specific climate that is my front yard. Half the buffalo grass fried.

The society garlic you ask? It's fabulous. It is sitting there taunting me. If it had died I would just weed-b-gone the whole lot and plant something I can handle, like grass. But no, the society garlic is there planting thoughts in my head like "you can just plant more of meeee!" and "don't give up yet, you're a great landscape artist. Even Michelangelo screwed up a few pieces." Evil. Just evil.

Maybe that's how it got the name "society". This garlic talks about you behind your back at garden parties.

Anyway - the city has given me until March 6th to fix my nature preserve. I'll let you know how I do.